Dear
Friends and Family,
Okay, so as the title
suggests, this week was a struggle, but I will get to that later. Monday we
went to the Memphis Zoo and it was super, super, hecka fun. It was Sister M's
birthday so we went with the Bartlett sisters and a ward member, S. and we had cupcakes and presents, and I made chicken salad, and we all just had
a grand old time. It was probably the first time since I've been on my mission
that I got lost in the moment a little bit, let myself go, and completely
enjoyed myself without thinking about home or being far away or anything like
that. That evening we ate with the J’s, who are the cutest family ever. We
were able to commit each of the kids to handing out a pass along card to
someone that they knew, and they were all so excited.
As good as Monday was,
Tuesday was bad. I found something out relating to my personal life that really
upset me, and I found myself too sad to do the work. We came back to the
apartment and I cried in my bed for an hour straight. I was upset about the
thing I had found out, but I was even more upset with myself for allowing it to
keep me so down. I never wanted to be the missionary that let some dumb thing
at home distract them from the people around them who desperately need the
gospel, but on Tuesday that's exactly who I was. We didn't have a dinner
appointment that night so Sister M. took me to McDonalds knowing that if
one thing could cheer me up, it would be McDonalds fries. McDonalds worked like
a charm, but not because of the fries (well, not COMPLETELY because of the
fries). While we were there I got onto the wifi to check my email and found one
from my Mom.
Jennifer K. Thomas is
the single greatest blessing that I have been afforded in this life. I had an
email from her telling me that for some reason I had been on her mind all day,
and that she just wanted to remind me that she loved me, and how proud she was
of me. I broke down right there in the McDonalds, and I'm sure I was
embarrassing my companion, but I didn't care. I am so thankful for a mother who
listens to the Spirit. I read the email at least six times, and after French
fries and an email from Hennifer I felt exponentially better.
Wednesday I asked the Elders in our district for a blessing, and it really helped me as I continued
to deal with some issues. The blessing was exactly the comfort I needed to know
that I can handle the things placed before me because I am here to do the
Lord's work, and He will always give me the strength to do it. That day we also
had an apartment check and I had a call to repentance about my lack of a 72 hr.
kit. Next P-Day project, yay!
That night the STL's
came and stayed with us because we had zone conference the next morning. I know
they were guided by the Spirit to be with us, because having them there to talk
to was just added comfort and strength for me.
Thursday's Zone
conference was a really enjoyable experience. We were introduced the Area Book
Planner app that we will be using from now on, and they also taught us how to
upload all the info from our paper copies onto the app. I, as a somewhat
technologically challenged individual, will really miss paper teaching records,
but I am praying for the desire and ability to utilize this new tool to the
fullest extent possible. (I just need to figure out how to use the dang thing
:)
I was so thankful for
the instruction we received from the APs and the Wakolo's, my mission president
and his wife. Much of it was a call to repentance for me. I have a long way to
go when it comes to diligence and consistency in many areas as a missionary. To
have leaders who consistently push us to be better missionaries is a blessing
to me, because it helps me know they love me and the people of this area.
That night we saw J. and had a big come to Jesus with him. We explained that we cannot continue to
meet with him if we do not see that he really is making an effort to read the
Book of Mormon, and gain a testimony. He is just so stuck on the anti-Mormon
stuff that he has been exposed to, and he is having a hard time giving the Book
of Mormon the chance it deserves. Sometimes I wish I could just shake him and
tell him how much better life could be if he would just accept the gospel.
Obviously that would be inappropriate, though. During the lesson he told me
that I yelled at him, and that made him not want to read the Book of Mormon, so
I left the lesson really upset and discouraged about my own abilities as a
teacher.
Thankfully, though,
Ja. still agreed to read something from the Book of Mormon that we gave him,
so we went home and prayed fervently for what God would have us tell Ja. to
read. We received the answer to have him read Mosiah, Alma, and Heleman, and to
have him study them alongside Titus and Ephesians from the New Testament. We
told Ja. this and he promised us he would pray about it and tell us Monday if
he would read it. I pray that he will be able to accept the reading and allow
the Holy Ghost to work in his heart.
We also had a lesson
with Jb. this week, and we laid out all his plans for baptism. He picked
speakers, someone to confirm him, the two witnesses, etc. He is so excited and
ready for baptism and we are so excited and happy for him. He is totally firm
in his decision. We told him that these next couple of weeks would probably be
a little difficult because Satan works really hard on people who are working so
hard to follow God, and Jb. said "Well too bad! I've decided to do this
because God told me that he wants me to, that this is the right thing to do,
and NOTHING is going to stop me now!" I am in awe of his faith! He is
already beginning to see the blessings of his righteousness though. This
weekend he quit his awful job that caused him to work crazy hours and sometimes
miss church, and found a job working as a mechanic, which is what he loves!
This new job will allow him to work far less, and he will always have weekends
off. The Lord really does work miracles every single day, and I am so blessed
to be witnessing so many of them on a daily basis.
Saturday we didn't have
a single appointment, and we spent almost the entire day finding. I was kind of
upset about it initially, but the day went by far quicker than I expected, and
it was a good day because we spent almost all of it walking around in 100+
degree weather, but we had a legitimately good time, and I was reminded once
again that I can do this. I was called here, and I am equipped to handle
it.
Unfortunately Sunday I
woke up sick and threw up all morning. Because I was so sick, we had to miss
church and basically spent the whole day inside. I am pretty upset that I
caused us to miss so much proselyting time, but it was better than someone
opening their door and me throwing up all over their front porch! The great
news is though that apparently both Jb. and the T's were at church!
I realize that every
week on my mission is not going to be easy. That sometimes I will have really
hard ones, but even with all the difficult things that happened this week, I
can look back and see multiple miracles. Sometimes it is when things get the
most difficult that you can see the hand of God the clearest. I also have a
powerful testimony of ministering Angels. I would not have made it through this
week without them. I am so thankful for this gospel, I am so thankful for the
opportunity I have to share my testimony every day, for my call as a
missionary, and for the people in Lakeland, Tennessee that have been prepared
for me. I am thankful for calls to repentance, and companions who love you even
when you don't always get along. This week has been a trial, but it is also the
week that I have seen my testimony grow more than at any other time of my
mission so far. I am so thankful for this renewed faith in God's plans.
Love,
Sister Hannah Kathryn Thomas
The first pic is when I
was really tired one night and I only took my scarf halfway off and then had to
stop because I was too tired to finish taking it off.
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